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The police stops a computer hardware engineer: Your light isnt working. You have to get off your bike. IT guy: I tried that but the light still isnt working.
Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
"The last woman I was in was the Statue of Liberty."
You know you're getting old when you stop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there.
A woman at a golf course begins yelling, ''I've been stung by a bee!'' Her golf instructor asks her where she had been stung. ''Between the first and second hole,'' she replies. The golf instructor tells her, ''Oh, your stance is too wide.''